We’ve all been there. Someone in your life, who you truly care about, has experienced something amazing, something worth celebrating, something that you instantly feel jealous of. This person got engaged to the love of their life, and you want to be happy for them, you are trying to be happy for them, but for whatever reason, you can’t stop thinking that it should be happening to you. Why do they get to be with someone while you’re still alone?
Or what about the person you don’t love, the person that in fact, you don’t even like. They’ve gotten an amazing promotion, they’re celebrating a booming career, and your blood is boiling that they have this moment to shine. Why is the person who annoys you more than anyone else more successful than you?
But maybe, you’re doing great, having these amazing life moments and great business success yourself. There’s no need to be jealous of anyone…until, someone tries to follow your lead. Someone in your town opens up a business uncomfortably similar to yours. They say copying is the best form of flattery, but you feel rage that someone else would try to do what you’re already successfully doing. Don’t they know there’s only room for one?
There’s a chance you won’t admit relating to any of these circumstances, but the reality is, we’ve all been there. It’s a natural, animalistic impulse to think what someone else has is unavailable to you. Scarcity is a mindset that makes sure you survive. You’re not a bad person for being upset about another person’s success, our society has trained us to be that way. But, there is a reason that we feel a twinge of guilt when we can’t be happy for other people. It’s because scarcity doesn’t feel good, and we know it’s not how we are meant to operate. Yeah, it will make sure you survive, but we aren’t on this planet, surrounded by a million little blessings in every second, just so we can survive. We are alive to THRIVE.
God wants to shower you with rich relationships, financial wealth, and abundant happiness. God wants you to experience a thriving life, but that CAN NOT and WILL NOT happen as long as you are operating from a place of scarcity.
Let’s think about it this way. Money is no longer a form of paper currency. Money is now a person and his name is Cash. You’re always telling your friends “I’m so mad I can’t come to the concert, stupid Cash isn’t around here enough” or “Cash is literally the root of all evil, just look how to goes to people’s heads.” Cash, the person, will never willingly spend time with a person who talks like this. In other words, he won’t spend time with anyone who has a scarce money mindset.
No one’s perfect, and we’ll always be working towards better abundance based mindsets, but this is how I try to talk about Cash. “I’m always mindful when Cash is around, I make sure we only do things that matter to both of us” and “I am so grateful that Cash spends time with us, he really helps us to share more with others.” Cash will obviously choose to be with a person who talks about him this way, a person with an abundant money mindset.
I lived a large part of my life jealous of other people: jealous that they had richer relationships than me, more material things, better career opportunities, the list goes on. It wasn’t until I could start celebrating other people’s happiness, that happiness started trickling into my life. And because happiness wants to be a part of your life, once you let it trickle in, it will BURST through the walls that have been built by fear of scarcity.
“You don’t have to blow out someone else’s candle for your light to shine.”
Ok, so your friend got engaged and you’re still single. GREAT! They are in love and you get to witness the beginnings of a long and beautiful marriage. Being joyful for them will attract the right person into your life. And isn’t it pretty egotistical to think that someone else’s engagement has anything to do with your relationship status anyway?
Yeah, the person you really dislike is killing it in their career. AMAZING! That professional success will bring them happiness that makes them better in every area of life. Celebrating their success will pull professional opportunities into your field. And isn’t it self deprecating to feel jealous over what you don’t have when you could be out there getting it?
Thank goodness someone else is in the same business as you! Now you can brainstorm and partner in creative ways to elevate BOTH of your businesses. There is room for everyone to be successful! And isn’t it self limiting to think there’s so few people to help in the world that only you can do what you do?
Don’t allow yourself to be pulled down by scarcity, it will never get you where you want to go or what you want. Abundance will always be a practice, but the beautiful thing is that can start practicing right now. My challenge to you is to write three cards to celebrate what other people are doing. Celebrate your neighbor’s new addition on the house even when you can barely afford monthly rent. Celebrate your sister’s new car even when you’ve been driving the same beater for 10 years. Celebrate your best friend’s new baby even when you’re having a hard time getting pregnant. Hand write the joy you feel for other people (even if you have to fake it a little at first) and watch as gratitude for your own life grows up around you. The potential for your life is endlessly abundant. I’m cheering you on with abundance the whole way.
If you are ready for a change, looking for more fulfillment or simply ready to feel better…you owe it to yourself to chat with me. Click the button below to schedule a 15-minute strategy session to learn more. To see the product I use and love click here.