Most 11 year olds are focused on having fun with friends and exploring different hobbies, their biggest concern being an introduction to algebra. When I was 11, I became responsible for buying my own clothes and having my own spending money. So rather than spending time on hobbies, I found babysitting jobs.
At 14 years old, many are starting to date and figuring out what extracurriculars they are really talented at. When I was 14, I lost my dad to a massive heart attack.
Lots of 20 year olds are off at college, having enough fun on the weekends to offset the stress of school. When I was 20, I was working all day as a secretary to pay for night classes, while weekends were filled with waitressing and teaching aerobics so I could to pay for the rest of my expenses.
At 11 years old I could have said it wasn’t fair to be that young and worried about money. At 14 I could have given up because losing my dad shattered my world. At 20 I could have quit school because the workload was hard and exhausting. And at those times in my life, a lot of the people around me would have reacted in those ways. But because I KNEW I wanted my life to look different, I had to see things differently. So at 11, I basked in the freedom of having my own money. At 14 I learned what it means to be resilient through the darkest of experiences. At 20 I realized the harder you work, the sweeter it feels at the finish.
I didn’t get to choose what happened around me at those young ages, but I did choose the attitude I carried through those years. Our attitude is like a pair of glasses we put on in the morning and view our lives through. They can be rose colored or jaded, they don’t change reality but they do change how we experience it.
It is my hope that more people consciously choose the attitude lenses they are wearing, rather than subconsciously wearing the attitudes of whoever happens to be around. So with that hope in mind, I am sharing 5 TIPS to take control of your attitude so you can experience as much happiness and joy in your life as you desire.
The Glass Really Is Half Full
So you’re facing a challenge in life, you’ve hit a big old road block. Let’s say you’re newly out of a job and a HUGE expense has come up for your house. Immediate reaction? “Are you kidding me?! Of all the times, this could happen, it has to happen now?? Why am I so unlucky, this is a terrible time. I’m never going to get out from under this.” Great, we’ve got that out of our systems. It’s ok to have that kind of knee jerk reaction, it might actually make it easier to find the good in the situation. All you have to do is turn that little outburst on its head. “There couldn’t be a better time for this expense to come up. This is the perfect motivation for me to find a new position. I could have felt bad for myself for weeks, but now I have a reason to get out from under this situation right away!” The glass is equally full and empty, your perspective decides what it’s really gonna be.
Yesterday You vs. Today You
I will say it now and I will say it again…Comparison is the thief of true joy. I’ll just go ahead and reiterate that right away…You will not ever be truly happy if you are worried about how you measure up to someone else. Applying this idea to what we are talking about here, the more you compare yourself to others, the more jaded your view of the world becomes. Your attitude starts to encompass a sense of lack and inferiority. Comparison is everywhere in our society, it courses in the veins of social media, which we willingly plug ourselves into. There is only one form of comparison that can improve your attitude and your life, and that is the comparison between who you were yesterday and who you are today. You get to decide if you’re going to show up better today, and a world in which that is the case is certainly rose colored in my book.
Attitude of Gratitude
The opposite of comparison is gratitude. When you release the inferiority complex and sense of lack from your mind, there is suddenly room to take on a new belief. I suggest you take on a belief in abundance, a belief that you already have everything you need. Abundance is directly linked to gratitude, and a daily gratitude practice is one of the most direct ways to change your daily attitudes. Every single day I write down five things I’m grateful for. And this is a great place to start if you’re new to a conscious gratitude practice. As your attitude of gratitude strengthens, you will find yourself overwhelmed with gratitude as you become aware of the abundance you get to experience in daily life. It’s a powerful cycle to find yourself in, because the more grateful you are today, the more you will have tomorrow.
A Healthy Mind Diet
The more you immerse yourself in positive environments, the more hardwired your brain will become in operating from a place of positivity. When you’re trying to make a shift in your attitude, you need to be especially conscious of what you are feeding your brain. There are truly unlimited sources of personal growth content to get you started on this journey. Listen to uplifting podcasts while getting ready in the morning (some of my favorites have been Super Soul Conversations and The Tony Robbins Podcast), read inspiring books before bed (Girl Wash Your Face, The Four Agreements, Think and Grow Rich), and attend in person events whenever you can (such as HPX with Brendon Bruchard which I just went to last week). Feed your mind a healthy diet and your attitudes will grow your life in the exact direction you want to go.
One of my favorite stories in the Bible is about a poor woman who gave an offering of two coins, which wasn’t much compared to others (there’s that pesky idea of comparison again), but it was all she had. While others gave enough coins to make noise in the temple, her offering made noise in heaven. When you are grateful for what you have, you operate from a place of abundance. When you are abundant, you are giving to others. When you are a generous giver, you attract more abundance into your life. When all other methods of changing your attitude aren’t working, give generously to someone. You can give money, time, kind words, it doesn’t matter what you give. The act of generosity will lift you both up.
It is through rose colored classes that I see you applying these tips to your life. When used correctly and consistently they will make your life feel more fulfilled and fill the lives of those around you with more happiness. And know that as I reflect on what I am grateful for today, you are at the top of the list.
I would love to hear from you!